Now more than ever, leaders are required to have a high level of emotional intelligence to deal with the impact of COVID-19 on their teams and colleagues. By increasing our understanding of the inherent roles we play in our life and work, we can improve our personal and professional relationships, and in turn become more effective leaders.

This was the theme of a recent interactive workshop led by Kimberley Lotery, Leadership, Executive and Systemic Coach at One Mind Coaching, for the Imperial Women’s Network. The audience of Imperial alumni explored how to become more efficient and empathetic leaders, ready for the business world of tomorrow.

“75% of careers are derailed for reasons related to emotional competencies, including inability to handle interpersonal problems; unsatisfactory team leadership during times of difficulty or conflict; or inability to adapt to change or elicit trust.”
The Center for Creative Leadership

The Drama Triangle

The session began by focusing on Stephen Karpman’s ‘Drama Triangle'. Kimberley talked through the interchanging roles of persecutor, rescuer and victim – a revolving cycle of relationship roles which we all play at some point. The roles are not static, although we have a predisposition to one.

Each position confirms our internal beliefs about ourselves and the others we are interacting with and influences how we react. We move around the drama triangle in a cycle of discontent repeating patterns that reinforce our internal scripts and narratives.  We often carry these traits with us from our personal relationship systems and family systems, through to the workplace unknowingly, with sub-optimum results. In order to break this cycle, personal enquiry and self-reflection helps to identify which role you naturally play.

Once you have established this, you can adjust how you respond to situations moving forward, and actively change this pattern to reflect the ‘winners’ triangle instead. This shifts the focus to ‘coach’, ‘vulnerable’ and ‘powerful’, a scenario where each supports the other to succeed. Re-evaluating the roles like this will help create a more positive environment for people to learn, work and thrive, communicating better resulting in healthier, and more equitable and empowered relationships.

Dysfunctional teams

Moving from the personal to the professional, the workshop also explored the qualities of dysfunctional teams and how these can be addressed. Stress points for a team can often centre around:

• Trust
• Conflict
• Commitment
• Accountability
• Results

Focusing on the quadrants of leadership conversation (Theory U, Otto Scharmer) Kimberley explained how to move from a non-reflective dialogue as a team to reflective dialogue, moving through the difficult states of ‘polite corporate speak’ to ‘breakdown of control’, through the inquiry stage, to reach a point of authentic communication and trust.

In order to successfully move through these stages, an essential element is listening and reflective enquiry which supports a move from an ego ‘I based’ awareness to a more ‘we based’ approach.

“By listening more effectively, we can move from a silo to a systemic view, ego to eco awareness that serves and support thee wider team/system. Leadership doesn’t exist in isolation, but in the relationships that we create,” commented Kimberley.

Listening skills

Strong leaders have strong listening skills. Analysing the type of listener you are will help your work and personal relations, and make you a better leader as well as team player. A person who is an ‘internal listener’ will hear, but only focus on how it relates to them and their own responses. A ‘focused listener’ is more attentive and perceptive, however to truly connect and be an empathetic leader you need to listen on a deeper and broader level. And this involves an emotional connection – taking note of body language, voice intonations and energy levels as well as an understanding of the others mental model. This is when you will move into a more focused coaching, empathic, resonant and leadership stance.

To facilitate this reflection, it is necessary to think about things from others perspective and explore how things can be interpreted differently - with  different biases, backgrounds, internal narratives and culture codes all shaping our mental models.

Participants took part in both practical and experimental exercises in groups, personal reflection work and group share, and a pre-session questionnaire to bring out the collective wisdom of the group. Using this process of internal reflection and self-analysis we can all become more empathetic and connected colleagues and leaders – exactly the traits needed to move forward in the business world of today and be future fit.

Project outline

As part of the Group Consulting Project Module for my Full-Time MBA I managed a project for Carpe Diem Resorts, delivering end-to-end analysis from hypothesis ideation through to execution and completion.

Carpe Diem, an independent boutique hotel in Santorini, was facing the challenge of high costs associated with managing and operating a luxury hotel, despite seeing increases in revenues over the past few years. My team was tasked with helping Carpe Diem better manage expenditure to achieve 10%-20% cost reduction within 1 year whilst maintaining brand-value.

Reaching recommendations

To help produce practical recommendations for the client we first engaged in a phase of in-depth research, deploying various methodologies including industry analysis and customer surveys, as well as an on-site visit to gain understanding of the business problems. We had extensive conversations with the Managing Director to better understand the nature of the business on the ground and even visited several competitors as part of the study. From analysis of the data and qualitative conversations, we produced several recommendations for driving their cost efficiency program.

As part of the process we received feedback from the Business School’s experienced consultants who provided guidance on our progress and how to improve.

We ultimately provided both our insights from the research and specific recommendations to help improve overall net profit of Carpe Diem in each individual area of their hotel business such as food & beverage, spa, rooms, etc.

What did you learn throughout the process?

I learnt a lot about delivering a real-world consulting outcome.

Whilst every team member was working on individual parts, it was important to have someone take on the role of project manager to oversee progress and to guide the team. I was fortunate to be nominated for this role and through this I learnt to manage a project and own it.

I learnt how important it is to have the right team with the right mindset and to have team members with different strengths to your own, who think differently to you, as it brings valuable perspectives to the project.

I learnt practical elements of stakeholder management and negotiation. We had to negotiate on all aspects of the project from milestone dates, budgets, resources, project scope, communication requirements, and sometimes even the definition of success.

There is also a delicate balancing-act between agreeing to what the client wants vs. what you can provide with the limited resources and time you have available. Something which is helpful when faced with similar decisions in your post MBA role.

This project also taught me to actively respond to change which is what you will constantly face in your career. The problem statement we started off with was not what we ultimately worked on and there was a lot of back and forth between us and the client as priorities changed over the course of our project. We had to learn to pivot and pivot quickly, which has been a useful skill I employ in my career today.

I learnt a lot about my own working style in a team comprised of different skillsets and how to adapt to different working styles to suit the individuals of the team. For instance, one member of the team was highly skilled in data analytics which I had to learn to direct to the relevant areas of the project and showcase this work to the stakeholders.

I learnt how important it is to have the right team with the right mindset and to have team members with different strengths to your own, who think differently to you, as it brings valuable perspectives to the project. My team all came from different career backgrounds and had different skillsets. As a team, we had extensive experience in Data Analysis, Business Strategy, Market Research, Financial Analysis and my own experience in the hotel and tourism industry. This reinforced to me the importance of setting clear objectives and goals for a project and aligning on expectations beforehand, allowing for mapping the skills of the team to the project and this is something I bring to my role as Business Analyst and Experimentation Lead - EMEA at Agoda Ltd.

What were the highlights?

Aside from our visit to Carpe Diem which was beautiful, it is the fact that our work and project holds relevant even today. This makes me very proud of our achievements.

The fact that Sotiris reached out to me earlier this year, to share how useful the project proved to be for him and his team since its completion, made it a very rewarding experience. And even more so that it is still bearing fruit through the COVID pandemic when the hospitality industry was suffering most. I wanted a project that had impact beyond the MBA grades, and it did, which was truly satisfying.

Carlotta Dal Lago (Executive MBA 2019) describes herself as “driven by curiosity, craving for learning and passion”. And this is evidently clear in her CV which sites many impressive higher education institutions including Harvard Business School, Cambridge University and LSE. She has travelled the world and lived in Latin America, Africa, Europe and the UK , and is currently Head of Business Development, Marketing and Communication for Anjarwalla & Kanna (ALN Kenya) one of the largest corporate law firms in East Africa and ALN, an alliance of law firms, present in 15 countries in Africa.

As well as this she is the founder of a Community Forest Association in Nairobi, The Nairobi Arboretum Conservancy (NACCFA), a business mentor for the Cherie Blair Foundation for Women, and a mother of twins. We spoke to Carlotta about her life, career and how she manages to juggle all her many roles and responsibilities.

Tell us about your current role

I am currently Head of Business Development, Marketing and Communication for ALN Kenya and ALN. It is an extremely busy role as we seek to provide an integrated service for clients doing business across Africa. Working with 15 different law firms, as well as leading the team at ALN Kenya, my role is complex and rewarding, navigating geography and culture, a matrix organisation, and internal and external stakeholders’ dynamics.

It is an incredible experience. The culture of the company is very similar to companies I have worked for in the past, particularly Bain&Company. Self-driven and entrepreneurial with a long-term vision. Committed to the advancement of the continent and future generations by improving the rule of law and supporting the education of lawyers. We’re deeply rooted locally but with international networks and connections.

I enjoy having the space to think like an ‘Intrepreneur’ - being given the financial resources and autonomy to proactively introduce new ideas, develop new structures and processes. It is rewarding to watch the transformation of the culture of the team, to witness growth and to empower members of my team to take responsibility and ownership. And this in turn enables the company to grow and succeed.

I am also the founder and Chairperson of a community forest association, NACCFA, which is working to restore and maintain the main urban park in Nairobi, the Nairobi Arboretum, together with Kenya Forest Service (KFS). The aim is to manage the park without having to rely on government funds by generating strong partnerships with the private sector and communities. I am developing a new management format which involves many revenue generation activities. We have become the centre of excellence for urban greenification in Kenya, a project that KFS and UNEP will launch on 5 June on World Environmental Day.

Tell us about your role as business mentor for the Cherie Blair Foundation for Women

Women’s economic abuse is more widespread than we think, and economic empowerment is an important topic to me since it is connected to a woman’s freedom to make the right choices and decisions.

The Cherie Blair Foundation helps women to release the entrepreneurial potential in low- and middle-income countries and empowers them to create better futures for themselves and their families. When women are economically empowered, everyone benefits.

I am currently mentoring an entrepreneur in Malaysia to help build her cheese business. She has everything she needs: intuition, determination, passion and she knows how to run her business. But sometimes it’s simply an encouraging word that helps to move things ahead.